Happy Earth Day, everyone!

How are you going to spend the day?

I am spending lots of time making useless trips in my gas guzzling SUV, letting my engine idle for hours on end, to pump as much CO2 into the atmosphere as possible. I have turned on all ALL the incandesant bulbs in my house, cranked up the AC, using up as much electricity as I can.

I am gonna' pour some used oil from my gas-powered lawnmower right onto the dirt in the alley.

I am going to make my carbon footprint as large as possible, just to piss-off Al Gore!

I am going to ask for plastic bags at the grocery store, AND paper sacks as well, to make sure more trees are cut down in the process.

Happy Earth Day.